The dog's diary:
7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!
The cat's diary:
Day 183 of my captivity. My captors continued to taunt me
with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly
on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The
only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and
the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt
to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the
top of the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors,
I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite
chair - must try this on their bed, (or car.....)
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in
an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of,
and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed
and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm,
not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I
was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I
could hear the noise and smell the food. More important,
I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of
inducing "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to
use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe
snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more
than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The
bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and
speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room,
his safety is assured.
But I can wait; it is only a matter of time.
